Surgery

I had my mastectomy on Thursday and everything went well. It is so nice to know that the cancer is out of me! I am waiting for the pathology report which will be back on Monday to make sure that all of the margins were clear, and I will also find out howtwill the chemotherapy worked. I am very sore, especially in my right shoulder where the lymph nodes were removed. It also hurts to breathe, I think that this is from the tissue expanders that were placed under my pectoralis muscle. I also have 4 drains in place, these don't hurt, but I have to drain them and record the drainage every 8 hours. Today I get to take off my "surgical bra" and dressings and shower. I haven't seen what I have been left with after the surgery, so I am a little nervous. I think we will do the "unveiling" after Paul gets home from church this afternoon. The plastic surgeon wasn't able to put very much saline into the tissue expanders ( think inflatable implants) because apparently the skin on my breasts is very thin. In the next week I will have my drains removed. In about 2 weeks, my plastic surgeon will start to inject more saline into the tissue expanders. Once they are inflated, I will start radiation. This should be in about 4-6 weeks from now. After the 5 weeks of radiation are finished, then I will have my final reconstruction. The mastectomy has been more painful than I expected, so I am not looking forward to the reconstruction. Paul and I have been overwhelmed with all of the support we have received. We feel very loved. Suzanne has been taking care of the kids and me for the last several days. Zach has been wanting me to hold him, and can't understand why I won't. I'm not supposed to lift anything over 10 pounds for a few weeks. Yesterday, she took Zach and Sam to Fillmore for maybe a week until I am able to take care of Zach again. I am hoping that I will start to feel a lot better soon. Thanks again to everyone for their support. Nancy

Vacation from cancer

Paul and I have been in Cabo San Lucas relaxing since last Wednesday. We decided to take a break before my surgery next Thursday. It has been nice to have no drs appointments or tests. Also, I am feeling really good, I ended up getting the blood transfusion and I think that helped. We have played tennis twice and I actually ran a mile yesterday and did OK. I am not pushing myself with running because after the mastectomy I won't be able to run anyway for a while. We went whale watching and saw some grey and humpback whales up close. Other than that, we have sat at the beach and by the pool, and have done a lot of reading. I love Jane Austin and have been reading Sense and Sensibility. I wish I could stay here for longer because I know when I get back I'm going to have to face the reality of my upcoming surgery next Thursdsay the 9th. I know I have to do it, and have been looking forward to getting it done, but when it comes right down to it, I am scared. I do not want to have my breasts cut off. I am also worried what will be found during the surgery, like how big the tumor actually is, and how many lymph nodes are involved. Paul keeps reassuring me that everything is going to be okay, and I am trying to focus on that. We are fasting today for strength, and that everything with the surgery will go well. I spoke in church last Sunday, the topic was choose you this day. I decided to talk about choosing how to react to, and staying strong and faithful during trials. Preparing for this talk helped me to remember what is most important in my life, my family, and my faith. A girl came up to me in the lobby of the hotel, she noticed that I was goig through cancer, and had gone through the same exact thing as me 1 year ago. She said how she turned to Jesus for help and was helped by prayer during her darkest times. Such good advice! A scripture I came across the other day talked about how god works by light rather than darkness. So true! I will update my blog after the surgery to let everyone know how it went.